Why do I still feel like a shitty wife?

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Upset Why do I still feel like a shitty wife?

Post by jmetz4 on Sat Sep 25, 2010 6:47 pm

I sent Chris a message today telling him I can't handle the dog and my aunt and uncle can't keep her for that long (almost a year). They have their own lives. I just got a response. I already felt like shit and it made me feel worse. Then he told me not to feel like a shitty wife but he's now crying over this. Then he tells me its freezing over there and they don't have their cold weather gear. He said he would rather not cause stress to our unborn child and thats why he's saying fine. Why to I still feel like a shitty wife? I am 90% sure that if I wasn't pregnant she wouldn't be stressing me out nearly this much and we didn't think I was pregnant when he left... I just want to cry. I hate hormones...
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Upset Re: Why do I still feel like a shitty wife?

Post by Kelly on Sun Sep 26, 2010 11:16 am

im not sure how it works...but could you see if they have "fostering programs" out there. maybe someone could foster the dog until he gets home?
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Upset Re: Why do I still feel like a shitty wife?

Post by Liz on Sun Sep 26, 2010 3:46 pm

I think you just need to decide what you are going to do. I know that sounds mean, but the truth is the more you stress about it, the worse it is going to get. Once you make a decsion and stick to it, it will be over. Just like pulling off a bandaid.
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Upset Re: Why do I still feel like a shitty wife?

Post by jmetz4 on Sun Sep 26, 2010 4:37 pm

I know. I told him to call so we can talk about it. I already made arrangement for her to be taken care of while we're in MD so I wasn't planning on doing anything before then anyways...
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Upset Re: Why do I still feel like a shitty wife?

Post by Hope on Mon Sep 27, 2010 7:48 am

hugs I don't really know what to say, just keep your chin up.

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Upset Re: Why do I still feel like a shitty wife?

Post by Jeannette on Mon Sep 27, 2010 9:01 am

You feel like a shitty wife because you're hard on yourself.

Not being able to keep the dog makes you feel like you failed your husband and can't control what's going on while he's gone.

It's not true though. I do that all the time. You'd rather put your husband's happiness before you and not being able to take care of the dog makes you feel bad.

Remember that you're only human and can only handle so much.

If you really can't handle the dog, get rid of her. Put an ad out there and interview a few people. Or...suck up and try to work with her. It's a rough decision, trust me...I know. lol

Lastly...make a package for your husband and send him something warm. A blanket, swiss miss. It'll make you feel better AND him.

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Upset Re: Why do I still feel like a shitty wife?

Post by crysty1e on Mon Sep 27, 2010 11:11 am

Good idea! agree
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Upset Re: Why do I still feel like a shitty wife?

Post by jmetz4 on Mon Oct 04, 2010 1:59 am

I read on cafemom where a woman made her husband a mini pillow with their son's picture. I was thinking of doing that or a blanket.

And I think we're going to try to work it out. She and I have been getting along the past few days. I'm going to look for a house to rent and if nothing else we're on the list for post housing. Also if having a yard doesn't help, my cousin in Illinois is willing to take her temporarily. The only thing is he is mentally delayed so I don't know if he really understands about having to give the dog back. My grandma talked to him for a while about it and she isn't sure either. But if all else fails. Then maybe when Chris gets home he would let him keep her.

I'm feeling better after "talking" (texting) him about it for a while.
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Upset Re: Why do I still feel like a shitty wife?

Post by Jeannette on Mon Oct 04, 2010 1:01 pm

The yard makes a world of difference, especially for her breed.

She needs room. That's the struggle with our lab.

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